An Inconsequential Story of Eternity

I met eternity just the other day, and he said that it's about time I told his story to everybody. Existence out of time is often claimed as rubbish claims primarily designed to render the human invention of the clock useless. But what if I told you that somewhere in nowhere, existed a place, which actually does not exist at all, and yet spawns through everything that you can possibly imagine, called Eternity, or more popularly named by the inhabitants - The Eternal Garden!

I haven't been there myself, but by a strange coincidence ran into all the rare escapees from the Garden one after the other. And on one fateful night, Eternity itself called upon me and asked me to bring a pizza and a diet coke along, and then we sat down and talked for a considerable amout of something, which should have been ordinarily classified as time. So, this tale is merely based on all that I understood out of all that I was told.

A long time ago, somewhere in the future, an evil emperor ruled the entire galaxy. The Evil Emperor, who when was a small child, was exposed to a series of movies by George Lucas, called as the first part Star Wars Trilogy. The dvd of the trilogy was somehow dropped by an astronaut from Earth while he was cleaning the windows of the International Space Station. And through bizarre luck, the dvd managed to crash completely safely on a comparitively technologically advanced planet. Such a primitive entertainment device existed only in their rarest archives now. The dvd was also placed among those archives, never to be opened, until one very ominous day. The young mischevious son of the Emperor sneaked into the archives, and he found his way to the dvd, as if the evil dvd had called out his name. The young boy sneaked the dvd home, and with the help of some of his geeky friends managed to play out the movie.

At the end of the three movies, the little boy was no longer a little boy. His life had changed forever. He considered the movie to be a omen in disguise, "deus ex machina" he called it. A sign from the Gods, as to what his destiny is to be. Of course he hadn't seen the second part Trilogy, and only fate can tell what would have been had he seen all the 6 movies. The boy decided that the universe must be taken over, and he gathered all the geeky kids on the planet, and started building weapons of mass destruction. Perhaps George Bush ought to have looked there rather than Iraq. Though there is no recorded evidence of the events, but the chain of events that followed were - the boy murdered his own father and became emperor. Then he started with his own solar system, and destroyed all life on all planets including his own planet, so that he shall not encounter any rebel factions from anywhere.

Finally the little boy arrived to destroy the planet Earth as well. Before he destroyed everyone on the planet, he went down to aquire the second part trilogy of the movie. And then he ordered for the weapons to be fired on Earth. And as life on Earth was being destroyed, the Evil Emperor saw the Star Wars Episode IV to VI. When he had seen them, he was extremely depressed. 'Was it to be this way? That good shall always conquer evil?' But by then he had destroyed all life in the galaxy. Then how shall he be conquered over. Filled with remorse and regret, he ordered that their ship be put on self-destruct. And hence, all life in the galaxy supposedly ended.

But in all this chaos and madness, the Emperor forgot to notice a lone astronaut cleaning the windows of the NEW International Space Station. This astronaut happened to be a descendant of the astronaut who had dropped that evil dvd a long time ago. When all the cleaning was done, the young astronaut went inside the space station and tried to contact Mission Control on Earth. But by then everyone was dead. Infact everyone in the galaxy was dead, and he was the last living thing alive in the galaxy. That didn't occur to him yet. God, who was busy playing dice at that time, suddenly noticed that the prayers on his laptop had stop coming in the frenzy rate they used to come. 'Just ONE unread message!! Thats gotta be an anomaly' God thought.

So, really annoyed at all that happened God himself went down to meet the last person in the Galaxy. The conversation went like this :

God : Emmm, Congratulations you won!
Astronaut : Won? Won what? And who are you?
God : Why, I am God!
Astronaut : You're kidding right!
God : No, I am not!!!!
Astronaut : Ok ok! So you're God!! Gawwwd, I get to meet God!
God : Yes well, as I was saying, ahem, Congratulations you WON!
Astronaut : Yes, well what is it that I won?
God : Ummm, this whole Galaxy really, its all yours now. Lots of people have been trying to own it since its inception, and now its yours.
Astronaut : Well..... what am I gonna do with it??
God : Gonna do with it?? Gonna do with it?? Don't you see I am giving you the GALAXY!!
Astronaut : See, I don't want the galaxy, but isn't there something else you could give me?
God : Hmmmmm, well there is this coveted post that I have long handled since the inception of the galaxy, ummmm why don't you have a go at it.
Astronaut : Post?
God : Yes well, you get to be ETERNITY! Sounds exciting right?
Astronaut : I dunno! How much would you pay me? Its gotta be atleast 50% higher than my last pay.
God : Pay you!?! You get to be Eternity. Everything is yours!
Astronaut : Can we talk in concrete terms. Even my last employer said the whole space station is all yours!! And all I was doing was cleaning windows.

And then after a considerable amount of coaxing and convincing, the astronaut finally became Eternity from the inception of whatever. So as a privelege of being Eternity, he got to own this place which was not existent anywhere in the galaxy, but outside time, just like God's own villa.

But Eternity didn't want to have a villa. He had always longed to live a simple life down in the countryside, with trees and flowers and grass. So, he asked the folks who designed the Garden of Eden, to come up with something similar, and they did a fantastic job. A wonderful garden with wonderful trees of all sorts was now in place. But Eternity himself is not allowed to present in a physical state, so the garden was all empty, while Eternity looked upon it. And very soon, he grew tired of this boring garden. So he devised a way to randomly bring stuff to the Eternal Garden - An eternity sphere which would in things with the help of a vortex.

Then eternity asked the giant serpent Ouroboros who was encircling Earth, to act as a Guardian for the garden. Ouroboros agreed readily, after realising that sooner or later Earthlings would turn their direction heavenwards. So Ouroboros arrived as the guardian, but there was a slight problem, as Ouroboros's main interest was to eat up it's own tail. However Ouroboros convinced Eternity that this would in no way hinder his work as the Guardian. And hence started the Eternity Storms, which is also known as an Eternity Recalculation Moment.

The first eternity storm brought in a little dinosaur, a baby T-Rex, and since time does not exist in the Garden, the baby T-Rex remained a baby T-Rex all his life. The mother T-Rex however grew extremely upset at the mysterious disappearance of her son, and she invited all the dinosaurs to discuss the issue of - Whatever happened to baby T-Rex! And while all dinosaurs gathered at the very same plateau, a giant meteor crashed onto the plateau, wiping out the dinosaurs from the planet. Baby T-Rex was however safely away, playing with Ouroboros and eating apples. An apple a day does keep the doctor away.

After that the eternity storms kept bringing in more and more stuff.