So, back here again to write. Writing is a pretty tough thing. Its not like I love to write or anything, but its just something I have to do. And then sometimes it happens that trying to write anything becomes a very painful exercise. And I just want to get it out all at a once, without really caring.
So, back to Trivandrum again. On the second day, we were all asked to come and introduce ourselves in front of everybody, and talk about anything we would like to. I had horrible memories of GMCS classes in April. Then I had decided to become invisible and every time I was forced to speak, it went horribly bad. So, I didn't really think it was going to be any different this time. But there were just 21 people this time, and most of them weren't doing that well either. So, finally Smitha called my name, and I walked up the room. I was held up for a minute cos the guy before me was discussing something with Smitha.
Finally I started, and I what I ended up saying was that - I am pretty nervous to come up here and speak, and I am basically a shy person, and so on. And then I decided to do a brief book review of - A Painted House. A easy way to fill up my time. I did pretty well. But I wasn't able to look into the eyes of the people sitting there.
I think I went up there once more that day, in a group activity. But I had very little dialogue then.
It was after the outbound learning experience that I had become comfortable with all of them. And I didn't mind looking silly in front of any of them. So, the next time I went to speak was the McDonald Murder Mystery play. And I was the narrator for our group, plus I had a small role in the end too. So, I added a little humour in the narration in the start. And I just filled up my part in the end, but I was really uncomfortable standing there and moving around. I was kinda the assistant police guy to Vinit. And my job was to call the suspects into the room and say a few lines.
It was the next time that I spoke, that I did really well. It was our group presentation on comparison on TCS with a competitor. Our group of - Vinit, Arif and Swaroop, chose Accenture as a competitor. Our group went last and I was to start the presentation. So when I came in the front, everyone was talking and no one seemed interested in listening to me. So, I just asked them to settle down and let me start. Then I started joking that - I am sure all of you are pretty bored by now it (it had been more than a hour of presentations by now), and you can go have tea/coffee if you want. Then I started my presentation and I spoke really well. Adding some humour and audience participation in it. It was fun. For the first time I felt like I belonged there and I can handle this. After I finished, our presentation was stopped cos the faculty listening to it, had to go.
I spoke once more in class after that. I was sent by my group to speak about the ATM Brochure we made. And Suja was the faculty listening to it. So, we were suppose to come up with a brochure on the opening of the 100th ATM of our bank. So, the brochure didnt have an address of the location, which I didn't think was necessary. But Suja thought otherwise. So, I came up with a wonderful line - We don't have an address cos when the 100th ATM opens, every ATM becomes the 100th ATM, and hence we don't want everyone to turn up on the new ATM, but to go to their nearest ATM. I spoke pretty well then, and I was enjoying being there too.
On the second last day of our ILP, our whole batch had to give a presentation on TCS financials in an auditorium filled with 3 batches of engineers, along with most of our faculty. I didn't want to participate in it, but Vinit wrote my name anyway. And since no one else from Delhi wanted to do it, I had to represent Delhi. So, what happened was that everyone made their slides, and we merged them all together to make the presentation. There were around 40 slides, and there were going to be 8 speakers. I thought 8 was too many, but then my opinion didn't matter. I just had to speak on my 2 slides and go away. But the biggest drama of our ILP was just about to happen.
So, after an hour of getting a feel of the Audi, the crowd began to settle in. And it was very cold in the Audi, and that made all of us even more nervous. Even Vinit confessed to me that he was nervous. So, Vinayak started the presentation in his usual casual funny manner, followed up by Swaroop. His slides were pretty pathetic and he couldn't put them in the right manner. There was a question from somewhere in the back, and we thought - OK, at least they are interested in this presentation. Next was Radhika, and after that Priya. Now after Priya had said her part, that same person in the back, started asking some questions again. And this time Priya was dumbstruck, she didn't expect questions, and she didn't want to take them either. Seeing her helpless, Vinit stood up and tried to answer it. But he didn't seem satisfied. And Vinit signalled to me, to stand up and stand with my part. So, I stood up and had a look at that guy. Pretty old to be a student here, so I thought maybe he was someone from the corporate office in mumbai.
I started nervously, and fumbled with the words. I went ahead with the controversial statement of TCS reducing salaries in Jan'2008. I had barely finished my first slide, when the guy came up with a question - Is the reason for profitability per employee going down this year, the high number of recruitment made by TCS this year? Was that some kind of trick question, I calmly replied - yes, tats the reason! But clearly he wasn't satisfied and said - I think there are other reasons for it! I said - ok, so you could share them with us. And then the whole verbal barrage between us started. He got me really annoyed but I was polite all the way through. I wanted to move on to the next slide, but he wudnt let me. So, I finally decided to have an audience poll. I asked everyone there if they really knew what rupee depreciation meant! One hand came up on the room out of at least 150 associates. I had made my point and badly pissed him off. In between Nisha, one of the faculty members, intervened to push his point through to me. But I was pretty annoyed by then, and I didn't listen to her. hen he provoked me further and I said the line that stretched it a bit too far - They don't need to be rocket scientist to understand that the denominator (no.of employees) is going up faster than the numerator (net profits) is, and hence the profit per employee is going down. He stood up, and searched for a exit where there wasn't one. Annoyed, embarrassed, he came back and down the stairs and shook his hand violently towards the crowd, disapproving of me and the presentation. He left the room and behind him some of the other faculty left too. I was standing there speechless. A few of the faculty told me to keep going. And somehow I stumbled to finish my part.
I sat down, and asked priya sitting next to me - Was I rude? She said - No, u weren't! Meanwhile drama was happening outside the room. Vinit, was called outside, and vinayak followed him behind. And Nisha, Smitha and Alpha started lashing on him. I didn't know what was happening outside, but I knew this guy was someone important and right now Vinit was being bashed up. Finally we finished our presentation and Smitha came up to us and said - Didn't you know who that was? That was Suresh, the Global Inductions Head!!! He wants to have a word with all of you, so please go back to your room, and he might be a little hard on you, so be ready!
So what was the worse he could do me - Fire me! Yeah sure, like I give a damn! So, he came along with Alpha and Smitha. And started making comments on the presentation and on each speaker. He really disapproved of everything. Finally he came to me, and he said something like - And you, you won't stay around long in TCS with such an attitude. If you did something like this at a client place you would have been fired by now. And wat was it that you were trying to prove with audience poll! Hehehe, I would have laughed on any other day, but dunno why I got really sissy about all of it. And my eyes felt a little wet. So, he left and Smitha wanted Alpha to show us how the real presentation should have been done. I was getting even more sentimental every minute. Finally Smitha called me out, and a really embarrassing thing happened. She said she saw me getting a bit touchy about it all. And she asked me if I wanted to meet up Suresh right now. I told her I would meet him later, and went off to the bathroom. My eyes were bloodshot red!! I washed my face, and came out. Devender, one of the mumbai guys who I had a argument with, while going to Kanyakumari, said - Great Sudeep, if I would have been in your place, I would have done the same, and maybe even worse! Support came from all quarters. Even Suja, one of the faculty, came up in class later, and said that she was glad that I was the one to face him, and I did a very good job in the way I handled him. And it was a great learning experience for me.
I later met Suresh and I apologised for no fault of mine. It was a short apology cos I thought I was rude to him. But more embarrassing was Smitha asking me if I was ok, every time I came across her after that. Really pathetic kiddo. And on the final day, we got feedbacks from Nisha, and he lambasted me again for what I did the previous day. Whatever!
But I really enjoyed it all in the end. And I listened to the audio recording of the whole episode and discovered I wasn't rude at all. So, in the end, I can boast of a really awesome thing that I did. And it rounded up the ILP on a wonderful high, and all of us coming together to face an external enemy!!
So, I did find my voice during ILP! And I will always remember it for that. It was a wonderful experience, and though I woudn't wanna join TCS in hindsight, but the ILP will always remain an unforgettable experience.
